2021 Vaughan Family Update

We don’t keep up with our friends as well as we’d like.  This family update is an attempt to keep you somewhat up to date on the happenings with Dee and Linda’s family.  We’d love to hear from you about your life. 

Linda is now more than a year past her fall that put her in intensive care, sent her to rehab, and wiped out ten days of her memory.  She has recovered amazingly well and is doing all the things she loves.  She continues to work with GED and diploma students for Lexington School District 2.  She teaches the young adult Bible study group at church.  She reads everything in sight. But, most of all, she loves being “Nama” to her four grands. 

Elizabeth Vaughan Davison and her husband, Rev. Josh Davison, live in Gaffney, SC, (Linda’s hometown) where he pastors the East Gaffney Baptist Church and she continues her wonderful work as a special education teacher.  Though they began their work at East Gaffney amid the Covid shutdown, they are enjoying a fruitful ministry there.  Elizabeth continues to amaze us with her devotion to and engagement with her scholars, as she calls them.  Their three boys, Liam, Creighton, and Josiah are now an amazing ten, eight, and six years of age.  The boys are thriving in school and enjoying everything from art to kickboxing in their spare time.  

 Josh Vaughan, and his wife, Jen, live in Lexington, SC.  Both work as physical therapists for Prisma Health with Josh focusing on athletes and Jen specializing in children and adolescents.  Their daughter, Juliana, is 2 ½ years old and pretty much rules the entire Vaughan clan.  Jules attends the Weekday Preschool at St. Andrews Baptist Church, which allows Papa Dee to pick her up most days at the end of her school day and have a few minutes with her before her parents arrive from work to take her home.  We’re thrilled that Josh and Jen have a second child on the way, a little boy this time.  They will keep his name secret until the time of his arrival, so, in keeping with their family tradition of names beginning with “J,” we have tentatively named the boy, “Juan.”  We’ll update you if that changes in March. 

Andrew Vaughan made a career change this year, leaving the baking industry to enter the world of finance with Palmetto Citizens Federal Credit Union.  He has begun his journey as a floating teller which has allowed him to become acquainted with different locations and get to know fellow workers across the city.  He’s enjoying this new challenge and hopes to move up in the organization.  The difference between Andrew as baker and banker is he can no longer bring his parents samples from work.  He and his friend, Richard, enjoy trips to the park, movies, and video games. 

Dee celebrated his tenth anniversary as pastor of St. Andrews Baptist Church.  The church is in a process of updating its identity and focus for the next chapter of its life.  With several staff vacancies, Dee stays more than busy enough, but looks forward to building a staff team for the future.  Dee has joined Pinnacle Leadership Associates as a network through which he hopes to do coaching and consulting work when retirement comes around.  He’s published a few articles and devotionals this year and has several books in various states of incompletion.  He hopes to finish “Don’t Let Go Before Dawn” in 2022, the story of his struggle with depression told in parallel to the biblical story of Jacob wrestling through the night with an unknown adversary.  He picks up a guitar most days and loves opportunities to be Papa Dee with his four grands.  His puns, sadly, have not improved. 

Basil, our four-pound Pomeranian, protects the family from backyard squirrels and practices his agility skills when Jules is in the house chasing him, “Basssil!  Basssil!”  We lost Winston, our Yorkie, just after Christmas last year to a malignant tumor.  He was with us for fifteen years. 

We hope this snapshot of Vaughan family life helps you stay in touch.  Now it's your turn!  Let us hear from you. May the Baby of Bethlehem warm your hearts this Christmas and guide your steps in the New Year. 

Plowing Straight in a Crooked World

Making Good Choices: Plowing Straight Rows in a Crooked World

When my dad taught me how to mow the lawn (yes, we had lawnmowers back then), he showed me a way to make a straight cut across the yard in spite of the presence of trees, shrubs, and swing-sets that could get me off course.  Dad taught me to locate an object on the far side of the yard and keep it in view as I cut a straight path towards it.  I later learned that the high value my father placed on cutting grass in straight rows was a carryover from his own childhood experiences of growing up on a farm.  He faced the challenge of plowing straight rows across large fields with numerous visual temptations to veer off in one direction or another.  His father taught him to find a tall tree growing just beyond the field he was plowing and make his row straight by keeping that tree in sight and using it as his guide as he crossed the many rises, falls, and slopes of the land. 

My dad’s technique has served me well.  I’ve never plowed a field and the only grass I cut is my own, but the principle of guiding my path by markers that transcend the landscape in front of me has often helped me make better decisions in ministry.  We seldom serve on level ground.  The landscape of church life is fraught with demands, issues, and personalities we must work our way around or through as we pursue God’s work in the world.  Our personal preferences, prejudices, and pain can add a steep slope to our field and pull us, almost unconsciously, in one direction or another.  Many of a minister’s toughest and most impactful choices are made in the midst of crisis, as though a storm uproots a tree that falls across your path.  How, then, can we remain faithful to our calling and make the best choices in tough times?

We must guide our course by landmarks that transcend the landscape of our immediate circumstances.  I have found that asking myself two questions, my tall trees beyond the field, helps me plot my path forward and stay on it. 

First, I ask, “If I based my next step solely on my values (not my feelings, fatigue, frustration, or fantasies), what step would I take?”   Asking this question doesn’t mean that my emotions aren’t real or important.  I need to listen to what I feel and learn from it.  But choices based on emotion are usually reactive in nature, allowing the forces of the moment to dictate our response.  Consulting your values allows you to look up from the pressures of the moment and see the larger picture of how you want to live your life. 

Second, I ask, “What step can I take that will move me forward in my journey of becoming the person God has created and called me to be?”  Asked differently, “How would ‘the me I want to be’ respond to this situation?”  This question unleashes the power of Paul’s life-guiding principle, “I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me” (Philippians 3:12 NIV).  Consulting your best self is a helpful way to see beyond the stumps and slopes of your present moment and choose a path that will lead you forward in your personal and spiritual growth. 

As you work your uneven, rocky, obstacle-ridden field, may you find your tall trees beyond it and let them guide you to faithful decisions and fruitful ministry. 

 

The Blessing of Belonging

 

(Hebrews 10:25, Barclay) We must not, as some do, abandon meeting together; we must rather encourage each other to do so, and all the more because you see that it will not be long now until the great day comes. 

 My dad and I didn’t have many disagreements, at least not out loud.  But during my teenage years, he and I went round and round about church attendance.  From time to time, one of my friends would invite me to go with them to some special program or service or event being held at another church.  I would ask Dad if I could go.  His answer was usually the same, “Son, you have a church.”  I didn’t like his answer or understand why he would hold such a firm position based on what I thought was narrowminded thinking.  After all, I wasn’t asking permission to go on a riverboat gambling cruise, just go to another church with a friend.  Once in a while, he’d let me go, but most of the time he reminded me that I had a church and that I needed to be in my place. 

 I obeyed, but didn’t understand, that is until "the day" came, not the day of Christ’s return, but the day our family was struck by tragedy.  My dad was diagnosed as having an aggressive malignant brain tumor.  Forty years ago, medical science had no real help or hope to offer him.  We took him home to care for him and make the most of the short time the doctors said we had left with him.  

When we brought dad home, I began to understand his deep devotion to his church.  My dad wasn’t just a member of a church in the sense of having his name on the church roll.  He belonged to a spiritual family.  He had brothers and sisters with whom he’d shared worship and ministry, friendship and fellowship, laughter and tears for fifty years.  And because he was bound to Christ’s body with chords that could not be broken, our family never faced a step of that heartbreaking journey alone.  Friends came to encourage us, speak words of life to us, and most importantly, listen to us.  Scores of little things were done for us so we could focus on caring for dad.  Our refrigerator was filled with food, so much at times that we joked we had enough potato salad to open a deli.  Our carpet was wet in places where our tears fell together with the tears of God’s people as we embraced each other and hurt together.  And in a moment so precious to me, I bowed to pray with a group of church friends, but was so emotional I couldn't choke out a single word.  My friend, as only a close friend can do, lent me her voice and expressed what was in my heart.  When dad passed away and we gathered at the church house, our church house, to celebrate his life, those friends packed the pews so completely that we had to seat worshippers in the choir loft.  When the day came, I saw, as never before, how precious and life-giving my connection to the body of Christ truly is. 

 The day is coming for all of us.  Yes, Christ will come again to receive His people unto Himself.  But other days are coming, too;

 ~      Days of opportunity when we’ll accomplish what one person can do alone, or what the gifts and strength of many can accomplish working together;

 ~      Days of learning when we’ll make every mistake for ourselves or share the wisdom each of us has gained on our journey with Jesus;

 ~      Days of disappointment and failure when we’ll fall and struggle to find the will and the way to get back up, or look up from our lowest places to see hands reaching down to lift us up, brush us off, and steady us as we take our first steps forward. 

 ~      Days of heart crushing grief when we can sit and suffer alone in the darkness or receive the comfort, understanding, love, and hope that can only come from belonging to a family, a body, the body of Christ. 

God has called you to me a member of Christ's body.  Countless blessings come to those who answer that calling whole-heartedly.  

Young Eyes Watching the Choir

The worship service was over.  Most of those in attendance had finished their after-church conversations and had made their way to their cars and were on their way to their next holy ritual, Sunday lunch.  Our choir gathered for a quick “right after church” rehearsal, a practice that lingers from the days of Covid restrictions.  As they began singing, the sound of their voices struck the ears of a little boy just outside the sanctuary, his family among the last to leave.  Just two years old, he is in a state of constant discovery.  He followed the sounds he heard into the sanctuary and stood very still in the aisle, transfixed by what he was seeing and hearing.  His grandmother had the presence of mind to save that moment and share it with us by taking a picture. 

 I look at this picture and wonder what my young friend is thinking and feeling as he watches a group of adults working together to praise God and proclaim the Good News.  I’d like to believe that his wide-eyed eavesdropping of choir rehearsal made a lasting spiritual impression upon him.  He doesn’t know how to read music or the meaning of many of the words the grownups sang.  But I hope he knows, in his two-year-old way, that people who love God have a song, that we combine our different voices to give that song richness and depth, and that we work together to share our song with excellence. 

Some of my earliest memories are of church.  I think those experiences shaped my heart and mind for God.  I’m glad my young friend is making church memories of his own.  I think every child deserves and needs that opportunity. 

Ways Not Wearing a Mask Will Complicate Your Church Life

 

While the Christian community revels in the joy of not needing to wear masks to church, you must, on balance, recognize that there is a downside to this development.  Prepare yourself for these ways not wearing a mask will complicate your church life.  

·       Women will need to apply makeup to the bottom half of their faces. 

·          Men who shave will need to be more thorough. 

·       You’ve lost a great excuse for not recognizing someone you’ve met several times. 

·       The music minister can see whether you’re singing the hymns.

·       The pastor knows you’re not laughing at his jokes.

·       You’ve lost this decade’s unique opportunity to accessorize with excellence.

·       You must face the sad truth that your ears do really stick out—it’s not just the elastic from the mask pulling them down.

·       You need to revise your “Do you have…?” list you recite to your spouse before you leave home (Bible, cell phone, and offering remain on the list). 

·       You’ll feel strangely frightened when you sing “Breathe on Me.” 

·       People will know you aren’t really a ventriloquist. 

·       You can no longer make an off the wall comment in your Bible study group in an altered voice and get away with it.

·       You’ll face the tough fact that some people really do mumble when they speak. 

·       You’ll no longer be able to start a hallway conversation with “Where did you get that cute mask?” or “Who is that masked man?” 

·       You’ve lost your facial billboard for supporting your favorite team. 

·       You’ll realize that some people weren’t distancing themselves from you because you forgot your mask—they really don’t like you. 

 ·       You’ll struggle with the decision of whether to donate your mask collection to the church’s yard sale.