Not Everyone Gets to Vote on Who You Are

When I served as a hospital chaplain, I made friends with a mental health counselor named Bomar Edmonds who worked just across the parking lot from the hospital and was a consultant to the chaplain’s department.  One day, Bomar and I sat down to eat lunch together.  He asked, “How’s your morning been?” then probably regretted he asked.  I’d just come out of my hour-long quarterly evaluation, a gathering of helping professionals who review your written summary of your work, then question you about any and everything related to your ministry.  The process can be grueling, especially when members of the evaluation committee try to outdo each other.  I didn’t think my time with the committee had gone very well.  I didn’t like some of the things they said.  I didn’t appreciate the tone of some questions they asked.  You may find this difficult to believe, but , with a “Remember the Alamo” attitude, I dug in my heels and took on the whole lot of them.  When I finished telling my friend, Bomar, about the inquisition I’d survived, he looked at me as he slowly took another bite or two, then added his own evaluation to brighten my day even more. 

“Vaughan, do you know what your problem is?”

“No, Bomar, but I think I’m about to find out.”

“Yes, you are.  Your problem is, you put a judge’s robe on everyone.”

“What in the world does that mean?”

“Apparently, you took what each of those people said about your work as some kind of final verdict about the kind of chaplain and the kind of person you are.  Don’t you think that’s too much power to give a group of people, some of whom you’ve never met before today?” 

“I hadn’t thought about it that way.  You may be right.”

“Of course I’m right.  Everyone has an opinion.  Some opinions are worth listening to and learning from.  Others aren’t.  But you can’t give every person you meet the power to decide who you are.  Most people don’t get a vote in that decision. So stop giving everyone you meet a judge’s robe.  Most of them aren’t qualified to wear it.” 

That’s some of the best advice I’ve ever received.  If he knew it or not, my friend Bomar agreed with the Apostle Paul.  You can’t let just anyone decide who you are.  In fact, for the Christian, only one person makes that decision.  In Romans 8:31-34, Paul explains the key to the internal security of the Christian’s identity. 

I am who God says I am.

Listen to Paul’s argument for that truth. 

If God is for us, who can be against us?  No one has the authority to veto what God has decided about us. 

We are so precious to God that He gave up His own son for us.

If God has declared we are right with Him, who is qualified to condemn us?  No one.

The resurrected Son of God represents us to God.  Who can challenge what He says about us?  No one. 

Not your coworkers

Not your neighbors

Not that circle of friends who don’t seem to accept you

Not your ex. 

Not the weak side of your family. 

And, perhaps, most amazingly, not even you. 

The love of Christ gives you an identity that nothing or no one can take away.  That identity gives you the inner security to live an abundant life.