When I began my year of service and study as
a hospital chaplain resident, our Supervisor gathered us around a conference
room table and spelled out his expectations for everyone on the chaplain
staff. One of his rules was that we promise
to give each other the benefit of the doubt. "Moments will come," he said, "when you’ll be tempted to question the
actions or even the motives of one of your coworkers. You’ll be stressed and sleep deprived. You’ll run short on patience with your
colleagues’ annoying ways. But that is
when you must remember your promise that your first thought will be that your
fellow chaplain attempted to do the right thing for the right reason. That gift will make us effective and keep us
united."
Right now, I wish I could gather everyone in our nation
around a very big conference room table and challenge each one of us to give the
rest of us the benefit of the doubt. We
don’t do that, at least not nearly enough.
We leap to judgment.
We hear a buzzword or two that leads us to identify another person as an
enemy. We thoughtlessly sort people into
groups like sorting out the suits of a deck of cards. You see a color and a shape and you know
where you think that person belongs. We
play mind-reader and claim to know the motives behind a person’s actions.
Imagine how different our national conversation would be
if you and I gave every person we encounter the benefit of the doubt. That doesn’t mean we agree with what they say
or condone what they do, but we begin with an attitude that says, “I believe
you’re trying to do the right thing for reasons that are important to
you.” What a gift that would be to our
nation and what a big step forward toward national healing.